How to become like a Buchanan

Want to be rich, powerful, and hated, all at the same time? Here's the easiest way to succeed.

Difficulty Level: easy to moderate     Time Required: 25 minutes

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Here's How:

1. Wear cowboy hats and occasionally plaid suits with leather inserts on the shoulder.
2. Have more ex-spouses than you do horses.
3. Have family members that died, but then came back to life.
4. Make a habit out of manipulating other people's lives.
5. Spend time in jail for crimes you didn't commit.
6. Have mad men constantly come after you.
7. Have children that you never see, don't know about, or have lost custody of.
8. Make sure you are a descendant of Buchanan city from the 1800's.
9. Change your motto to "Do or Die".
10. Marry someone who is twenty years or more younger than you are.
11. Cheat on your significant other with someone who is in a relationship with another family member.
12. Get married three or more times.
13. Become related to a Texas oil tycoon.
14. Disown your family but later come crawling back to be accepted.
15. And finally, if you aren't already a Buchanan, don't worry you'll find out soon you are one of their long-lost heirs.
    

Tips:

1. Don't ever be fooled into thinking someone would do something nice for you, there must be an alterative motive.
2. Don't let life's weekly crisis get you down, you'll get through it just in time for the next one to happen.
3. Don't be alarmed when you catch your spouse with another family member.
   

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• How to tell if you are in Llanview
• How to Become a Llanview "Bad Girl"
• How to Become a Llanview "Bad Boy"
• How to Be Like a Llanview Socialite
• Index of "How To's"